August 8, 2016

Thoughts: Inevitable Change


*Sweeping of dusts* Oh hey! Hi you guys! Sorry I've been pretty distant from my blog ever since the last few days of Ramadan. Well, if you follow me on my instagram, you might've noticed that I celebrated Eid in Australia alongside my family members. And as I returned from the trip, something kinda changed in me.

And I'm freaking out cause I don't know what it is.

I talked to my friends about it and I had experienced a couple of days where I just wasn't in the mood for anything in my life. They would tell me that such feeling is pretty normal for everyone cause yes, in life we go through changes every so now and then. And these changes are what your heart wants and is telling you to do or be.

Well I guess I pretty much expected this to happen seeing how my instagram feed has also changed earlier this year. I mean, I know, it's just instagram, right? But it's the person behind it who's responsible for the change. And aesthetically speaking, you can know so much and yet so little about the instagram owner in a glimpse or by going through their images and captions.

And so now I decided not to dwell on it and simply embrace it cause I feel like I'm liking this change. What changes you ask? Well like I said, I really do not know what they are, but I can honestly tell you it revolves around my thinking, my perspectives in life, my character and my decision-making aspects.

So the other day I decided I needed to declutter my life, materialistically and spiritually. Without any warning I immediately ransacked my room and got rid of everything that I didn't need. The process was merciless. I took out every little thing that does not provide purpose in my life anymore. I changed the entire theme, and left very little so that my mind aligns with whatever that goes on in my room.

Your room is your sanctuary I tell you. So it is EXTREMELY important for you to have that unbreakable connection to it. That is the place where you kneel before your God in a silent night. Where you laugh uncontrollably watching stupid videos, or where you cry to sleep at night. Where you discover what you love/hate about your body while standing in front of the full mirror, and where your mind wanders with every flip of a page from a book you just got.

Imagine what I would do if I have a home of my own one day :p

And after getting me the space that I wanted, I felt a sense of relief from the inside and slowly but surely towards outside.

This is me embracing my change.

This is me evolving.

This is me being eminent of the person I needed to be.

So yes, I had to share it with you cause I know you will go through such phases in your life like this. And when that happens, don't be scared like I did. Don't cry like I did. But instead, welcome it with open arms, seeing that all of this must be sent by Someone above, amiright?

Do what you must do so that you'll gain that emotional balance once again. And when you do, you'll surprise yourself with all the amazing things that surrounds you in life. You wanna eat chocolates for breakfast, do it. You wanna dance crazily happy in the middle of the street, do it. You wanna buy 3-4 sneakers in a day, do it. You wanna lie down doing nothing straight for 3 hours, do it as you please.

This life is about making yourself happy. You are your own priority and heck, do whatever it takes to achieve that.

*Note: Post was drafted two weeks ago*
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adiba rusli said...

yes. priority our life. thanks for the reminder. we dont live to please anyone :)

meenahxoxo said...

Well written Shea, I can relate so much. This post is inspiration as I find myself frequently in this position... Next time I'd try de-congesting my surrounding space first. Thanks

sue. said...

I love you Mama.

shea said...

adiba:
i agree with you! xx


meenahxoxo:
yes, i find it so liberating cause of course your sanctuary is the closest thing to you that shapes your life from the outside in.

sue:
i love you moarrrr umisue!